remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
Randomize
