watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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