She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
