it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
Randomize
