Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
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