spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
someone owes me an orgasm
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
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