Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize
