I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
He had one of those small greek statue penises
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
Damn victory sex feels great
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
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