"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Randomize
