Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
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