i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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