Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
Randomize
