Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
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