im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
We smell like vodka and hangover
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