her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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