I can't breathe out the right side of my face
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
