Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
