mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
Randomize
