from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
Randomize