I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
Randomize
