Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Randomize