sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Randomize
