Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Alive.
So much puke
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
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