i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
well most of my day revolves around power hour
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
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