I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
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