lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I wanna bring you to show and tell
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
Randomize
