That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Just pee around me
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Randomize
