holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
it glows. i had to have it.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
my liver is dry heaving
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Randomize
