Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Randomize
