just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
Randomize
