its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
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