So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
