her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
Randomize
