I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
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