honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
Everything about him screamed your future.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Randomize