Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Randomize