Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Randomize
