we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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