I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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