i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
