I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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