K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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