i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
Randomize
