4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Nicole vs. Life
babies were throwing up all over the place
our cab driver is having phone sex.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
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