her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Randomize
