so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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