You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
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