just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Randomize
