Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
