my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
did i walk over a car last night?
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize