he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Randomize
